Don't Lie Like You Don't!

The beauty of being a scum shift worker is that every weekend is a long one and this Monday got me thinking about a strange phenomena that I am convinced exists. What I am talking about is Music Video Dancing or MVD as I like to call it.

Obviously since music and videos were combined into the one MTV friendly package, the game has changed dramatically with bands like the Korn successfully prolonging their mediocre careers by making interesting music videos.

Now I was born in 1987 and I am certain that growing up side by side with music videos on rage every weekend, my dancing has been so influenced that others of my generation will never truly know what it was to dance before music videos were introduced.

What is MVD? What the fuck are you talking about I hear you say? What I'm talking about is dancing combined with lip syncing that you do in your bedroom, around your house, walking down the street or for the daring, out at a club / rsl when you're too drunk to know any better. I'd say everywhere except the club, this kind of dancing is more than accepted as being awesome. Surely you get what I'm saying, that feeling of a camera being right their, shooting your every move for the next MTV smash hit.

I think previously this sort of dancing would have been referred to as Tom Cruise in undies dancing, but for the sake of keeping it awesome and to appreciate its evolution, I call it MVD.

Don't believe me? Bring in the Evidence!

Youtube: Fatboy Slim - Weapon of Choice



If you have produced a sequence of movement like that of the god Christopher Walken at a club then you are probably too awesome to be wasting your time reading my blog. But I challenge to find anyone who hasn't been home alone, perhaps making breakfast and to have this song come on Channel V or whatever poor free to air shit you watch music videos on and for you to have fought against the urge to dance, even replicate Mr Walken.

Now this is not my most definitive example, as it lacks a crucial element to great music video dancing and that is a track with a great vocal melody to complete MVD with perfect lip synching.

Look no further than The Verve for some very lip synch friendly lyrics complete with super strolling from Mr Ashcroft. Say 15-20 years ago should someone have been powering down the street in such a fashion, mouthing the words the way he does, oblivious to everyone he would of copped the same hostility that Richard did. But not these days, you see someone mouthing something and walking in a creative fashion, "what he doing?" you think for a moment until you realise "oww MVD".

Youtube: The Verve - Bitter Sweet Symphony



Both Walken & Ashcroft demonstrate great ability in the two major elements that make great MVD but then there are examples where the two come together in a glorious synergy and this is where truely glorious MVD occurs.

Yes that's right, you guessed it, Wham... WHAM RAP!

While there are many examples, there is nothing more satisfying for a young man than to master the lip synching of Wham Rap and then combine it with some truely glorious Music Video Dancing. Wham Rap is also great because it requires the MVD'er to spit out some rap but not the proper ghetto stuff that takes skill and a good memory to perfect but rather than great white boy rhyming type rap that anyone can do. You know, rhyme man with am, S with best, space with place.

And finally, the addition of a bit of synthesized brass always gives it a real stirring feel when you pump it really loud.

Youtube: Wham - Wham Rap



So you tell me, am I losing my marbles or do we all have an MVD gene inside of us that just won't go away?

Ow and anyone who drops the "you must be gay" lines, dont even bother. Those who insist on pushing the persona of not being gay are the ones who dance the hardest in their living room. It will only highlight you as a chronic MVD'er!