I ain't saying shes a Crate Digger...

My faith in life was slightly dulled on Sunday night as the double header of Australian Idol and the ARIA awards was on the television, which made me consider the possibility of considering self-harm. Since the horrible events of that particular evening where all my dreaded predictions of award winners came to fruition with Nostradamus-like accuracy and horror, I have been looking around for something to listen to, something that could bring back my belief that Australian music is indeed incredible.



So I did some metaphorical crate-digging and I picked out The Necks. Unfortunately under-appreciated yet still have enough of a cult following, they sit somewhere within an experimental-minimalist-jazz sort of frame and have been kicking for the best part of 2 decades. Trying to find an mp3 is a killer, but I found this live performance they did for the ABC earlier in the year that I am sure you will enjoy.

MP3: The Necks - Live Performance for ABC's 'Set'





I wanted more music to satisfy my urge, so I listened to Rhode Island noise-mongers Lightning Bolt. This track was released last year on their Hypermagic Mountain LP. Its a buzz-saw-to-the-face job, wrecking up shit as it tears through your speakers and ear-drums. The drums, bass and vocals are filthy and abrasive, and it is beautiful.

MP3: Lightning Bolt - Captain Caveman

Buy 'Hypermagic Mountain' from Amazon


My faith in life has returned.


EDIT: oooo im so scared..
http://www.smh.com.au/news/digital-music/aussie-alert-rip-off-music-well-get-you
/2006/10/31/1162056971903.html

I'm All Over You, Electric Blue

This might be one of those instances where I am slightly out of alignment with the rest of the world but bare with me, and please if you think I'm wrong let me know (but keep in mind your opinion is only as good as your blog... and yes I will profile search you).

I am sure no one will dispute that it appears as if everything that is the 80's is coming back and has beeeeeeen back for alittle while now. It's a welcoming trend and it marks a magical time when most of the nows best bloggers were born.

Now i've seen the vintage collection at all the general pants stores around, I’ve gotten back into ABC & Journey, I even have the mp3 of Wham! Rap. So please explain to me the one band missing in all this? Answer: Icehouse Deadset love them or consider them so cheese-filled you love them, why isn't every nerdy white kid searching the airwaves for a sniff of classic cool sitting on the net, typing in his blog with a bloody Icehouse shirt on, all be it slightly stained thanks to that macaroni & cheese which was just a little too runny?

Well aside from not liking macaroni and cheese before it is cheaper than the net profits of Youtube which wont be taken in lawsuits, I posting some long overdue love in the direction of Icehouse. This week on Max they are showing a "Loving: Icehouse" hour all over the joint and it just highlights an Aussie band who should be held on a pedestal pop equivalent to that which places AC/DC in the rock realm.

I will have to see if the A-Reminder Top 25 Australian Bands list allows artists like Icehouse who haven't really been in their hayday for quite sometime but have a back catalogue worth enough street cred it could buy you a Mr T "I pitty da fool" tattoo signed by and engraved by Murdoch whilst riding in Napoleon Dynamite's Grandma's Four Wheeler on the Starship Enterprise.

To refresh those ignorant enough (a.k.a me 6 months ago) not to know who Icehouse are, Ive posted their most recognizable song in youtube form for you all to be reacquainted. If you don't know "Great Southern Land", before putting the gun to your anterior cingulate cortex because clearly it is malfunctioning, check out the song just so that you can blast yourself into sustained nothingness without the burden of the heavy heart you wont even know is there.....



I'll wait while you two catch up
....
....
....
....
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....(starting to remind anyone of a bullshit chain email yet?)

Ok, and now for my blissful finale, I give you all the track Electric Blue which I am extremely sure is widely known to a very large portion of you. Instantly lovable for anyone with a tinge of 80's in their blood and I would confidently say twice as good a track as "Great Southern Land". If you find yourself hopelessly singing "Electric Blue" in the car when you realise your like me and you've ripped out your cd player for repairs that your taking 6 months to do because your no good at that sort of thing, then "Electric Blue" has bit you with the same lovebug as I.

Mp3: Icehouse - Electric Blue

This goes down as one of those songs (much like anything by the Midnight Juggernauts or Van She) where you listen and say "f-yeh" Aussie.music.equates.to.heaven (im sure some new yorker trying to get in on the Aussie music scene will take that name for a blog...or not). It is such a finely crafted piece of crunching, dramatic and winding pop music. The synth and the over produced drums infused with the subtle crunch of the guitar and Iva Davies' soothing voice make it the sort of song to have you singing a duet whether Iva likes it or not. Not only does the song have such sublime features but it fills me with even greater pride to know it was released in the year of my birth, 1987. Yes girls Im showing my here age.

Also, Some good news. According to the Icehouse / Iva Davies official site, Icehouse have a new album which has already been released and tracks from the NEW album are available via their website and you can even download the new single "Your God (not mine" which tip toes and stomps in varying ways to that of "Electric Blue" and "Great Southern Land" which seems to float above the sum of their means, but thats not to say it isnt good.

WWW: Icehouse / Iva Davies

December boys got it bad

Classic Rock radio has a tendency to alter music history. As they say, history is written by the winners, with bands like The Beatles, Rolling Stones, The Doors and The Kinks being poster boys for rock n roll in the 1960s-70's. Big Star unfortunately are one of those bands almost totally written out of Rock history by classic hits radio and flashback television shows who seem to think only number one singles make great bands.

Sure commercially they weren't as popular on the scale of the aformentioned bands, but Big Star were arguably better than them all. They practically created Power-pop, which has proven to be one of the most influential and enduring genres of music. Alex Chilton and Co. created near perfect Rock N' Roll; non-abrasive, full of melody and lyrically engaging. Artists such as Jeff Buckley and Elliott Smith have covered various Big Star tracks and many modern bands cite these guys as heavy influences. They were like the Beach Boys, minus the faux-surfer boy schtick and far more musical and versatile. To find the best Big Star material, look for the #1 Record/Radio City era work.

Big Star are great.

MP3: Big Star - Life is White
MP3: Big Star - September Gurls



Those kind folks at NME have the entire My Chemical Romance album 'The Black Parade' available for streaming. Do I like it or not, I hear you ask? Ill tell you when i'm finished. I'm up to track 5 and so far its total shit....the single was no indication of quality so far. While you are there at the NME have a laugh at Panic! at the Disco's claim that they are not an emo band. Sure you aren't an emo band. Now go and cut yourself.

STREAM: My Chemical Romance - The Black Parade


This evening if you have nothing planned or have something planned that is worth cancelling, crushing whoever it was you were meeting for drinks for life, head down to Sydney's most beautiful hole in the ground Candy's Apartment, where the crew from The Sandwich Club present some top Aussie acts including Poly and the Statics and City Riots rocking out. It's 10 bucks and starts at 8pm. Thats a tasty sandwich.

Only 5 more sleeps.....

The ARIA awards are less than a week away. Yippee I hear you proclaiming from the roof tops, yet another year where mediocrity reigns supreme, tweens are placed in artificial mosh pits and told to 'go nuts' by losers in non-functioning headsets and the worlds biggest toss-bag Rove McManus tries to make wise cracks and in the process further reinforces the fact that he should be shot in the face.

Wading through the nominees, quality is scarce on the ground and the winners as predictable as Rove failing to make people laugh. Eskimo Joe will no doubt win awards for being inoffensive and plain shit. Bernard Fanning will win something because he was from Powderfinger, one of the most overrated bands Australia has ever produced. The Veronicas will win and award because tweens bought lots of their records and they are twins you would consider sleeping with. No doubt Hilltop Hoods will win a 'gong' as white boys rapping seems to be the style du jour among the Nova listening drones, despite rapping with an Australian accent sounding completely stupid. You Am I scoring a nomination is a slap in the face to all the hard working bands in this country who strive to make original music, something You Am I cannot lay claim to; and if Youth Group win Single of the Year for ripping the heart out of 'Forever Young', one of the most chilling and beautiful pop songs of the 1980's I will run to my television and put my foot through it.

But there is hope that the night wont be a complete crock. Midnight Oil will be inducted into the Hall of Fame. The Presets and Augie March, two acts kicking some serious booty around the world right now have scored nominations in various categories, and the one of the most addictive singles of the year 'I Love It' by Sneaky Sound System also picked up a nomination. But I doubt that these artists will win.

Im putting $10 for 'Flaunt It' to win the best Dance single award. HA! The ARIA Awards are on this Sunday evening, live on Network Ten in Australia.

ARIA Awards website



WBDF have an exclusive regarding the western Sydney club scene. Sources have told me (by the way this is unconfirmed and may infact be false) that the infamous Bloc Niteclub, scene of many drunken brawls between wannabe Rugby League heros and horrid dance moves may be shutting up shop in Penrith early next year and moving to the larger city of Parramatta, 30kms away. If they do move, its a clever one by the proprietors. Parramatta has a huge clubber market...but instead of fist fights...there will be guns. Stay tuned.



Finally on the topic of western Sydney clubs, a new club will be commencing operations in Blacktown, a major centre that has been without such a venue for as long as I can remember. The international club franchise 'The Booty Bar' will kick off in the recently renovated Central Hotel, this Friday the 27th October. The picture of Eva Longoria on the advertising will get many through the door, me included.

I Like Ice Cream

Right now, three of my favourite songs which I must attribute its discovery to the blogosphere revolve around the sweetie goodness that is ice cream. Personally, nothing makes me happier than getting to work early and strutting straight into the kitchen, looking the head chef right in the eye, opening up the freezer, taking out a tub of ice cream, curling myself out three to four scoops, adding caramel topping, adding chocolate topping, sprinkling with nuts and topping with a light dose of sprinkles, all the while maintaining that look like "You will not charge me extra for nuts as I am not going to pay".

So needless to say when music can incorpate and even embrace an affection with ice cream, it makes me happy. However the music cannot suck... in the instances I plan to show you now, they do not suck, they lick.

Thanks to the spotting of Sandwhich Club, I was passed on to what apparently is "old new". The track Mr Ice Cream by Soft Tigers somehow slipped through my obsessive net but caught by the men who can boast the biggest footlong.

Grabbing a spot on the all-star - who's who MSTRKRFT line up in Sydney alongside the callibre of Knife Machine, Midnight Juggernauts & Ajax is no small feet for any artist. Obviously this lead me to stand up and take notice. But still in my endless downloading Mr Ice Cream fell through the net!

Then I had what I hear many bloggers calling an "Ipod epiphany" however I would call it an "Onix $34 256mb epiphiany" whilst driving to work to ofcourse enjoy splendours of pre-work ice cream. Now whilst summer is dragging its arse, it is on the way and i could think of not more pleasant way to spend it that getting out your boombox and favourite b-boy threads and walking the streets flipping this hot tune. Favourite lyric "These kids have been packing cones all day".

Soft Tigers promise to bring you the ladies, if not money back!
(moneyback will not be honoured if you are a ranga)

Mp3: Soft Tigers - Mr Ice Cream Introduces
Myspace: Soft Tigers

It wouldn't be a post by the Pix if he didn't clog your insides up with youtube like cheese does your insides (if you dont get that then you've never eaten a block of cheese and you like star wars).

New Young Pony Club are certainly very very hot right now. There is no doubting they've got the funky electro goods to go a long long way. And if i were doing a blog in 2006 on Ice Cream, it would be a tragedy for me not to mention these guys.

So rather than blogging all the bullshit everyone else bothers with and giving you new "it" words about your favourite bands, im gunna take the high road (a.k.a the im too high to bother thinking right now road).



Ok, now I have never been very good at maintaining a theme or sense of logic to what I post, so now im going to u-turn you all to the bluesy acoustic sex of Tom Waits. Don't be fooled into thinking it's Bob Dylan, ok, be fooled because it is probably Bob Dylan teleporting into other peoples heads like he so often does.

Couldnt remember for the life of me what blog I picked this little number off, but I'm sure Hype Machine could help you out if you wanted to give someone else props.

Simplistic in its delivery but so very listenable, It captures a really great side to Tom Waits, considering as good as he is, I dont think there is much to his dimensions (yeh yeh i know you're thinking the music heirachy are gunna shut me down, i dont care).

Anyway, whether Tom Waits is a moody genius or just another Tom to throw with the rest of em, in the context of Tom Waits being encapsulated by this song, I like it and suppose I like him. Whatever, just listen.

Mp3: Tom Waits - Ice Cream Man

Belles Will Ring-a-ding ding

Photo by Daniel Boud (2006)

Ok.. worst title ever, I know. Moving on. Other bloggers and anyone with a myspace page will appreciate the amount of emails and messages one receives about new hip bands and the next big thing. Most of it is bullshit, however, being the obsessed and lazy university student I am, I'm on this bloody internet long enough that I owe it to the real music makers to give it all a go (baring of course bands with a name like "too tuff for tuesday").

However, my incessant listening to everything has resulted in some fantastic finds including and not limited to Tigercity, Hello Lobster and now Belles Will Ring. Then upon further inspection I noticed the band has had press shots done by Daniel Boud (aka Boudist) and now I'm thinking ok so regardless of how they sound we know they are in their Sunday best.

Residing in the enchanted (and sometimes inbreed) Blue Mountains of Western Sydney not 20 minutes from my place, I was even fuuuurther stunned. In being completely honest with myself and with you people out there, The Blue Mountains has been responsible for producing some of the most horrendous cafe acoustic music in the history of anything and moving down alittle further Penrith is responsible for not only giving these blue mountain cafe bong smokers another stage to use, but producing emo-hardcore-screamocore-vomit sounding counterparts to share the stage with on completely mismatched incomprehendably band line ups. So as you can imagine, any kind of music which originates from within a 20km radius of my house makes me weary.

But, fear not good people, Belles Will Ring are just an absolute treat. Their label Architecture label clearly has their marketing brains in the right place and came straight to the bloggers for action. Belles Will Ring sound as if they are the next moody ever-changing "it" band to come out of the UK or Europe or anywhere more cultured than Western Sydney. But a band like this restores the collective faith that cesspools can produce maestros (like whiteboydancefloor!).

All too often I hear all these new hot Australian bands who are promising to be the next great item in accessible pop music, but they fall short or they sound like a band who are still finding their feet, still missing something but Belles Will Ring are good looking, musically stunning, visually pleasing, lyrically revelant and they tick all my boxes, much to my delight and surprise.

Mp3: Belles Will Ring - Mad Love

Myspace: Belles Will Ring

The album Mood Patterns will be released early 2007, ‘Mad Love’ is out now, on the Architecture Label.

CSS, The D & Outkast

That may be alittle over the top in describing these self proclaimed rock n roll icons, but there is no understating the power of the D. They burst onto earwaves with the flogged to death "Tribute" but if you bothered to purchase the album which featured that track, you'd realise there is a lot more to the sum of their means. With the blockbuster movie "Pick of Destiny" on the way, Tenacious D have a new album comming out simaltaneously. The first single is appropriately titled "Pick of Destiny" and without going all goo-goo over it, "Pick of Destiny" typifies everything Tenacious D are preaching. This is not a chance for me to sing from the rooftops about discovering a new band or a new sound or a new wave or any of that bullshit, this is just perfectionately rocking (making up my own words, i dont care) and it has some expected ridiculous lyrics belted out by Jack Black.

On a side note, I saw Nacho Libre last night... frankly it is absolutely horrendous. But so horrendous it made me laugh the whole way through. Get me?

Myspace: Tenacious D - Pick of Destiny



Now onto some sizzling news hot off the press (from about 3 days ago). My wishes have in part been answered. Since I have decided to piss the Big Day Out off for much greener and more prosperous (CBF spell checking right now) pastures, I have been awaiting the arrival of some truely dirty sounds.

The sexiest band in music right now is comming to Australia! That is right people, Cansei De Ser Sexy will be in Australia in early January. With my birthday being on the 5th and them comming on the 2nd, it feels as if they contacted the Australian Births, Deaths & Registries and asked when is it Pix' birthday. While they know my actual birthday im unavailable due to the endless signing autographs that comes with going out in public, the 2nd January will do me fine. It is only a brief visit and more so i should say CSS are comming to Sydney & Melbourne, but still... they're comming.

Here is the tour dates:

Cansei De Ser Sexy (CSS)
Jan 2 Bar Broadway
Jan 5 Frontroom – Revolver Upstairs

Thanks to Liveguide.com.au for the info.



Finally. Outkast. I still cannot get past Idlewild. I can't really ellaborate further as it has all been said before, but it is certainly a quality album and one where I'm seeing alot more Big Boi and finally liking that fellow considerably greater than in previous instances. So I'm offering you a few more tracks to see if you all agree with me.

Mp3: Outkast - Buggface
Mp3: Outkast - Makes no Sense at all

Buy Idlewild here.

The Black Parade

My Chemical Romance are the real deal. I am totally convinced that they are true rock stars and capable of writing amazing pop music that isn't consigned to the guilty pleasure basket much like their modern day punk rock contemporaries and their earlier work.

I just witnessed their new video 'Welcome to the Black Parade' and I was totally gobsmacked. Gerard Way has positioned himself as some sort of emo-punk king and he looks every bit a king in this clip with his bleach-blonde crop adorning him like a crown. The opening shots of the video of him on that TV screen bring to mind images of a military dictator, the crowd entranced with every word he utters as he calls them to arms.

The song is stunningly bloated and overgrown, and makes tracks like 'Helena' look impotent in scale. Its blistering, soaring and the ultimate statement from a band that is about to take over the world. It is a blatantly over the top, operatic track that is so ridiculous its almost perfect.

This band matter. I might regret every word i've said tomorrow, but I doubt it. The new album is out late October and I can't wait.


VIDEO: My Chemical Romance - Welcome to the Black Parade

Top 5: 'Weird Al' Yankovich Videos

Nerds of the world! Your musical demi-god is here! Love him or hate him, you cannot doubt that 'Weird Al' is doing something right by making a very successful career out of paroding pop music songs for over 25 years. Parody is something that is mostly hit or miss affair, but 'Weird Al' has churned out consistent quality laughs for a long period of time. Those outrageous lyrics are oft paired with equally outrageous videos, and here are my 5 favourite videos from the Weird one himself, you probabaly will disagree with me here ....and to many people's dismay, 'Fat' nor 'Eat It' don't even make my list.



5. The Saga Begins (1999)

Weird Al's response to Star Wars Episode 1 - The Phantom Menace is a 5 minute ode to the film which simultaenously parodies the Don McLean track 'American Pie'. The video isn't side-splittingly funny, but lyrically it is a triumph. Weird Al captures many of the plot elements of the film and coupled by some intergalactic dancing and in turn offers up a very funny track and video.



4. Like A Surgeon (1985)

This video is a fairly early one in his career, yet it still is brimming with those random objects of hilarity Weird Al videos are known for. Why does Weird Al look like Napoleon Dynamite? The rabbit out of the body? The Operation game board on the wall? And that dancing at the end LOL. Madonna would be proud.



3. White and Nerdy (2006)

His latest offering is one of his most clever and amusing. The cameo from Donny Osmond is icing on the cake for a video highlighted by amusing references to HTML, Monty Python and orthodontic-approved grills. Never has it been so cool be white and nerdy. OK, I admit. I did see alot of me in this video.




2 . Smells Like Nirvana (1992)

The intensity of grunge is ripe for parody and the video for 'Smells Like Teen Spirit' was a prime target for the Weird Al treatment. Weird Al pounces on Kurt Cobain's poor command of articulation and creates a veritable Wheres Wally of amusing moments in the chaotic background. The guy on fire and the dude who loses his arm gets me every time.



1. Amish Paradise (1996)

The Amish, however lovely they are, were asking for it. Weird Al puts on the beard and hat for this clip and spits come very clever rhymes over Coolio's 'Gangsters Paradise' with some hilarious visuals featuring obnoxious tourists, amish pr0n and barn building. Fool!

Whiteboy Weekend

I know a lot of blogs have me foaming at the mouth for an installment of tunes to have me foaming over the mouth come the weekend. In a busy week think of this as our plead for forgiveness at the lack of posts.

Mp3: Klaxons - Gravitys's Rainbow (Van She Remix)

This is one of those dancefloor smashers. Wednesday night saw myself and the rest of the whiteboydancefloor crew head down to Candy's Apartment yet again to be danced til we drop by some of the best djs Sydney has to offer. Needless to say when Van She (or Van She tech) whatever... when they dropped "Klaxons - Gravitys's Rainbow (Van She Remix)" it was like if the dancefloor was a person, their head would have exploded. Apart of me thought chix and Van She mmmmmm but after a mind boggling set, I must concede these shielas wouldnt even stop to avoid me on the road. And with good reason, they are fuckin brutal good.

Mp3: Justin Timberlake -Sexyback (Linus Loves Remix)

Anything you can do, Linus does better... he can do anything better than you. This includes Justin Timberlake. Put simply Linus takes a hot song and throws a bit of electro dirt on it. It doesn't stray too far from Timberlake's tree but I mean it's the subtle additions Linus makes to anything he touches which gives the track a bit of Linus cred. Im yet to hear Linus fuck up... yet.

Mp3: The Presets - Are you the one? (Van She Tech NYC Rush Mix)

Ok so while they take away a bit of the sexy action that makes "Are you the one?" a dancefloor stomper, they have easily made the best mix of it I've heard. "Are you the one?" has been morphed into a four to the floor electro punk ripper. I cannot explain why but the song fits in with a Tapes n Tapes - Cowbell paradigm on music, like I said I havent any significant evidence to back that, but in the same vein... somehow.

Anyway, Wednesday night @ Candy's Apartment showed me one very clear thing many other fine tuned bloggers already know, but some don't pronounce it often enough. Without a doubt or question or query or murmur, Australia has the most envied music scene out of any country in the world. Right now if you look around, the only thing the blogs are talking about (well the ones with any kind of cred) is Australian music. Particularly when it comes to music of the electro, dance, house (whatever other name you wanna give it) genre.

If you disagree I challenge you to make a list better than this:

* The Presets
* Van She
* Van She Tech
* Midnight Juggernauts
* Cut Copy
* Bang Gang (Ajax is without doubt the coolest person I have ever or will ever meet).
* K I M (from Presets ofcourse)
* Bag Raiders
* Teenagers in Tokyo
* The Valentinos / Knife Machine

That list took longer to type than it did to think of. My point, Australia is clearly the pinnicle of everything electro, so rather than going to all those American blogs for whats hot, save yourself the time and energy and stick with the Aussie blogs.

Sandwich Club / Who the Hell / A Reminder / Open Your Eyes / Get Big Little Kid / Brown Cardigan / Twelve Major Chords / And many many more ofcourse!

*Addition: How could i forget Boudist & Rocking Hoarse Two of the most unique and original blogs their are!!!

Leave your Stereogums and Pitchforks and Gorilla vs whatever's behind for the real tastemakers. Im not saying all non oz blogs are crap or all non domestic music is crap but If nothing else we atleast have better names! It's like Channel Seven winning the news ratings with Ian "Roscoe"Ross, it just makes sense!

Phew well I am all blog-fucked out... so there is nothing left to do but wish my amazingly beautiful friend Ashley (the blonde lass in my display pic) a very very very happy and booze filled birthday as she is turning 20 I do believe. While she won't probably get to read this until she's hungover and skipping university on Monday, im sure it will all be worth it. Love ya ash!

It needs less Cowbell

The DFA, remix duo James Murphy and Tim Goldsworthy are on a winning streak. The DFA Remixes – Chapter One was a superb compilation of remixes, each standing on their own as symbols of their rare skill of taking an already great song, giving it an organ transplant with far superior insides than before.

Well the second installment in their Remixes series is upon us, again featuring some incredible remixes. One such track that that pricked my ears a little while ago when I was listening to a killer Tim Sweeny mixtape was their remix of ‘Slide In’ by Goldfrapp. Yeah it has cowbell, but I dare say it is the most fitting use of the much maligned instrument ive heard on a track all year (yeah even better than anything done by The Rapture). That rhythm is seriously infectious, with light synthesised trumpet stabs punctuating Alison Goldfrapp’s sensual intonations.

The real quality that DFA posses is their knack for restraint, texture and contrast. A hallmark of their work is mixing up textural elements, thinning it out at the right time to give that contrast follwed by an expert build up of tension and release. They nail it in this sprawling 12 minute number, and it is seriously impressive, and I defy anyone to find a better producing team in the world today.



MP3: Goldfrapp - Slide In (DFA Remix)

Buy DFA Remixes Chapter Two from Amazon


On the topic of all things DFA, the next installment of the Modular Monthly will see the DFA vs Modular, with The Juan McLean and Tim Sweeny coming down under to play some shows with the Modular DJ's later in the month. http://www.modularpeople.com for more information.


To all those lucky people who scored tickets to the MSTRKRFT show at the Forum on Saturday night, I envy you. I was totally shocked when I walked into my friendly neighbourhood indie store to purchase tickets to find they had completely sold out the 1500 capacity venue. From all reports the show was incredible, and I will start my own BDO rumour....they will be back in January for it. Maybe im just a little jaded, but it will happen dammit!

I'm a Man not a Disco ball

Ok so since I didn't have anything new, fresh or funny to post for you good people I thought we might aswell dabble in the joys of a good retrospective. Hey if its good enough for Who the Bloody Hell are They? to do retrospectives, then im more than comfortable with doing the same! Sometimes you people need to be reminded.

Forgive me for ranting because I know it is on the way.

My Issue: The lack of "f-yehs" thrown the way of the Electric Six. The fact that the world does not embrace this band is a clear indication that the masses are being swallowed up by inept and out of touch musical tastes. Now I know some of these blinded masses read and enjoy the blog (i said some, im not as egotistic as Kayne.... yet) and I can just imagine the amount of burgeousie phrases being cannonned at my words of love for this band.

Let's get one thing out of the way... yes they did sing the song "Gay Bar". Your lack of education to the splendours of their other songs is a testament to your own lack of intelligence or maybe your extreme levels of ignorance. Either way, while I hate quoting Jet, you really need to "Get Born".

Another thing I want to glaze over is that they have a new album out "Switzerland". Where my affection will forever lie with this band is in the helping of sexy rock n roll "Senor Smoke". Given bad reviews by Kerrang and Blunt Magazine, that right there should have been evidence enough that possibly infact certainly this music would prove to be good as both those magazines present some of the worst musical opinions going round. Rolling Stone, whilst you are a peice of shit I'd never consume as food in the first place to allow you to become shit, I'm going to leave you alone here.

It concerns me that so many people dismissed "Senor Smoke" as a b-grade follow up to "Fire" which spawned the hits "danger high voltage", "dance commander" & ofcourse "gay bar". But if any of you had bothered to actually buy the album (or download it from packetnews) then you'd have realised this album is a dancefloor winner! One of very few bands who are taking that mainstream rock n roll paradigm and injecting it with sexy synth and dance successfully.

And finally, Electric Six are a partially comical type outfit. Too many of you are taking this halarious take on sexuality, rock n roll, dance and funk far too seriously. Electric Six want us all to get up on the dancefloor and show your very worst dancemoves. They typify what whiteboydancefloor is all about!

Electric Six are truely for "the ackward dancer in all of us" and perhaps you all need to stop firmly pressing your lips against The Raptures album for just long enough to realise "yes, you are allowed to listen to other music".... "no, you dont have to read good comments from your favourite blogger to like them". I appreciate I either shooting myself in the foot or biting the hand that feeds me or doing some cliche phrase my Grandpa would know, but the fact is, you need to do 3 things;

* Buy "Senor Smoke" for an inflated price from JB Hifi and do it with a smile because they slap on a stupid fucking "special import" sticker or alternatively download the free mp3's i am offering you.
* Burn them to cd or leave them on the computer should that device be in your bedroom.
*Wait until no one is home and fuckin make the room a dancespace! Push those preloved socks and undies under the bed and be a complete ackward whiteboy wanker!

Special Tips

• * Thrusting of the pelvis is a must. It is preferred to thrust when the guitar crunches in to emphasis the power in your pelvic thrusts. Doing these sporadically will give them more artistic affect. These thrusts will prove most effective when added to "devil nights".
• * Keep the knees nice and bended, almost like jelly. Pretend you've had a few pina coladas and then whilst the knees are bent for the most part, bring yourself to upright to throw out a bit of a rock n roll kick at designated parts of the song.
• * Facially, it is important to keep the mouth open much like many rockstars. Tilt your head to one side and bust out to your imaginary audience as if you just dont care. But we know and you know, you do. The "just dont care" persona is a must should you be funking out to "Future is in the Future".
• * If you do not have hair to thrash about, not to worry, click here.
• * Finally, after you've given the songs some serious spinage on your player and begin to get a feel for the song... start to bust out some air instruments. Not a air guitar person? Not to worry, the synth keyboard stylings of "future boys" really allows for some seriously sexy air keyboard and "future is in the future" allows for some random air brass, however be careful, these outburts of brass are difficult to first pick up and getting it wrong really ruins the "just dont care, im so 90's but not really" attitude.

As they say on Art Attack, try it yourself!

Mp3: Electric Six - Future is in the Future (yousendit.com)
Mp3: Electric Six - Devil Nights (yousendit.com)
Mp3: Electric Six - Future Boys (yousendit.com)

Tigercity, Gang Awry-ing & Robokopping

There comes a time in every persons life where things we never thought we needed come to haunt us. Mine is a credit card. Normally the allure of having extremely bad debt doesn't really interest me however upon exposing my ears to the tigercity ep on a daily basis through their website, I am shattered. Quite clearly there is not good excuse the world can give me why these hook & groove chefs are not cooking up a storm accross the world yet! Maybe they are and I'm too far removed in Australia to know. The point is, their music is shit hot and you need to get into it.

My personal favourite is "Are you sensation" which you can stream via their myspace but for you today I shall deliver the first track off the ep "Timecard". Im not saying they push some musically unheard of envelope, but they make fantastic music. You dont need to know anymore.

Mp3: Tigercity - Timecard

If you on the other hand do own a credit card, head over to their website asap and purchase yourself a copy.


And to think we haven't mentioned Gang Awry for a while! I'd like to give you a good excuse but Im fresh out. So what's happened since we last mentioned em riding high on the "New High" single & ep released of the same name?

Well Im excited to say Gang Awry have a debut album on the way, as far as i know there hasn't been a release date set but it seems gradually there is a real cult following of individuals waiting with baited breath for it's release. This is on the back of some pretty impressive support gigs including The Angels & Andrew Belew and the release of the single "pretty mess" in August i believe has seen them gigging non stop.

For your listening pleasure today we have a 1 and a half minute preview of the new single "pretty mess" available for stream and download through their myspace page. Personally I was expecting some four to the floor funkadelic sound and as "pretty mess" demonstrates, Gang Awry are not about finding a formula and sticking to what's expected. To their credit the single is fantastic dipping through melodic soft points and atmospheric highs. Yet as always with a band like Gang Awry, they're not taking you on some "done it before" rock experience, to best describe "pretty mess" i'd say the song takes you through enjoyable twists and bends. Whilst the Gang Awry sound is boosted greatly by the vocal thrust, a closer listen to the music off-setting the vocals shows some real colour and contrast which overall seals the deal that "pretty mess" is a winner.

Myspace: Gang Awry - "Pretty Mess"

Gig of the Week

Catch Gang Awry down @ Candys Apartment in Kings Cross on the 13th October to see just what this tour-de-force is made of.


Finally (and I always like to finish with a bang) I could not be the blogger I want to be without mentioning the dangling pippy long stockings of soccer, Peter Crouch. Not only a fantastic soccer player but a deadset funny bastard. For you to show your fellow office workers and friends alike, I give you the man Peter Crouch doing the robot!

If this doesn't make you laugh, you have no soul!




Also if anyone is like me and loves the cheesy 90's rap song that accompanies the video, you can check it on some illegally made myspace page (link below).

Myspace: Skee Lo - I wish

OMG liek BDO '07

Finally the time has come, the first line up announcement for Australia's biggest (biggest doesn't mean best) music festival, the Big Day Out. Here we go...

Tool
Jet
Muse
Violent Femmes
The Killers
Scribe
Spank Rock (Yessssssss)
Peaches
My Chemical Romance
Eskimo Joe
The Herd
The Sleepy Jackson
The Spazzys


Yeah just as we thought, so far, so shit. Spank Rock and Peaches are two acts I will be dying to see, as well as Tool of course. But Jet? Didn't Eskimo Joe play last year? And do The Spazzys still exist? Violent Femmes, aren't they so 1980-whatever? MCR will bring the wrist slicers out of the closet. WTF? Sydney date is not on Australia Day and the price goes up again? I am buoyed by the fact that this is only announcement #1, so we shall wait and see if it improves. Nice Guns n' Roses rumour LOL.


Dates and Ticket info: (from bigdayout.com)


FRIDAY JANUARY 19th AUCKLAND MT SMART STADIUM
Maurice Rd Penrose. Gates open 11am
Tickets $110 +bf

SUNDAY JANUARY 21st GOLD COAST PARKLANDS
Smith St Southport. Gates open 11am
Tickets $115 (inc GST) +bf*

THURSDAY JANUARY 25th SYDNEY SHOWGROUND
Showground Rd Sydney Olympic Park. Gates open 11am. Event closes midnight.
Tickets $115 (inc GST) +bf*

SUNDAY JANUARY 28th PRINCES PARK SOUTH
Royal Pde North Carlton, Melbourne. Gates Open 11am
Tickets $115 (inc GST) +bf*

FRIDAY FEBRUARY 2nd ROYAL ADELAIDE SHOWGROUND
Rose Tce Wayville, Adelaide. Gates Open 11am
Tickets $115 (inc GST) +bf*

SUNDAY FEBRUARY 4th CLAREMONT SHOWGROUND
Graylands Rd Claremont, Perth. Gates Open 11am
Tickets $115 (inc GST) +bf*

Tickets go on sale Friday 13th October and you can get them from the usual places you get them from or through Ticketmaster.

Sexy Never Left

Cansei De Ser Sexy. What is there that hasn't been said? It seems as if they have injected, infected, smothered and covered the entire world of sexy people with their sexy sounds. Timberlake cant bring sexy back when Cansei De Ser Sexy never let it go in the first place.

So after reading countless marvellous reviews of this group both live and on cd and having countless offers of free download of "lets make love and listen to death from above" & "this month, day 10" i thought to myself what sublime music, what an amazingly sexy south american noise.

But surely these other bloggers would have steered me in the direction of the best? Wouldn't they? Clearly this doesn't happen, for the Cansei De Ser Sexy album must be like a holy grail of music, only those with the uber-coolness to have a copy of the album will know its full wrath.

But I am going to be breaking from blog-only exclusivity and giving you all one of the finest which has been so sorely overlooked. It grabs classic grooving by the scruff of the neck and morphs the sexy crunch of the guitar into a dancefloor winner. If this song doesn't seem dancable to you, then it is because you clearly dont ever freestyle to anything other than techno music. And you suck.

Mp3: Cansei De Ser Sexy - Music is my hot hot sex

Nouvelle Fox

Fox n' Wolf have been doing the rounds for a while and last year their schizophrenic electro 12" double A side Youth Alcoholic/Rules Out put their name out there in scintilating fashion. The Swedish crew just last week dropped another 12" single titled In Yer Underwear on the so hot right now Kitsune label, featuring the hot title track and the killer Jasper Dahlback remix of it.

If you like your electro cut up, chewed and spat out by a bunch of filthy robots spawned in the 1980's by equally filthy robotic creatures, with vocals snarling in the vein of Tigarah and acidic lyrics that clear the dancefloor and pave way for the dirty groove, then you will dig Fox n' Wolf. Their debut LP will be out in the near future on Kitsune.

STREAM: Fox n' Wolf - In Yer Underwear
MP3: Fox n' Wolf - Youth Alcoholic
MP3: Fox n' Wolf - Rules Out



You all understand Nouvelle Vague's schtick by now, they take classic tracks mostly from the 80's and cover them bossa nova style. Everybody loves their new album Bande a Part, and how can you not? This video is a live cover of 'Love Will Tear Us Apart', not taken from that album but great just the same. Enjoy.